Friday, October 18, 2013

potty training


Today is day seven in our potty training adventure.  This week has been emotional and filled with lot of learning for everyone!!!

We started "working" on potty training Bryce and Zoey started about a year ago.  Zoey was starting to take a little bit of interest in the bathroom and was showing some really early signs of being ready.  At that point Matt and I decided to start introducing the potty and the concept of using it.  We purchased kid potties, let them join us in the bathroom, and if they asked to try we always put them on the toilet to try.  It was very rare that we had any success but they were learning and knew the idea.

About a month later, we decided to try potty training Zoey.  It went horribly!!!  We did the timer, let her run around naked, treats, the whole nine yards.  After two days she was miserable and we had gone through more paper towels and cleaner than we usually did in an entire month.  She just wasn’t ready – she couldn’t control her body and she didn’t want to use the potty.  We backed off as soon as she started getting upset about it and decided to give her more time. 

We planned to try with Zoey again this last May, after we got home from a trip to Virginia.  However, the Air Force didn’t take our plans to potty train into account…they sent Matt to SOS.  We again, chose to wait on potty training until we were moved and settled into our new home in Louisiana.  In the mean time I made training underwear, researched methods, asked questions and talked with other moms, read about potty training, bought books for the kids, and read other mom's experiences.  (One of my best friends wrote a great post about her experience on her blog.)  I wanted to be prepared next time we tried, I wanted to know what to expect, I wanted to do it right! 

Last Friday night we went to bed prepared, alarms set to wake up before the kids, and ready to spend the entire weekend in the bathroom!  We chose to start Bryce at the same time as Zoey just to try.  We really didn’t think he was ready but since Zoey was starting and Matt was able to help me we figured it was worth a shot.  I will be honest, I felt confident going to bed and I was sure I was ready for everything the weekend might throw at me. 


Day One: 
The alarm went off before the kids got up, we got showers, and headed into the kids room the second we heard them stirring.  Very excitedly we told them that today was the day we were going to be big kids and use the potty!  Zoey ran right in and climbed up on the toilet, Bryce waited to see what she did then climbed up.  We put them both in the training underwear and set the timer for 20 minutes.  Then we went to get breakfast and juice so we could keep pushing fluids all day.  BUT I forgot the juice!!!  How could I forget the juice!?!  I was prepared and ready, but really, I forgot the juice?!?  I rant to target as quickly as I could - two containers of juice later I was home, the kids had full cups, and Matt and I had coffee!  
The kids were doing great with trying.  Every time the timer went off they tried to use the potty.  While they were in there we sang, read books, gave fist bumps, and tried to make it as fun as we could.  Every time we had a success it was a BIG deal - cheering and clapping and dancing (I'm sure our neighbors though we were on drugs).  For every successful pee they got three skittles and poop they got a starburst, the observer also got one skittle.  We only used the real toilet, we didn't want them to get used to the kid ones and have to transition later.  Plus, the toilet in their bathroom has a lid with a built-in kid seat and they were so excited about it.  By the middle of the day we were having about a 50% success rate with Zoey.  There was no point in the timer by the time she was having some successes...she kept asking to try and running to the potty.  Bryce had several successes but he only told us he had to go after he was already going.  It wasn't a pretty or clean day by any means.  By the end of the day we were both covered in pee, had gone through several rolls of paper towels, and done two loads of laundry!  We were ready for bed time but were very excited that the kids were trying.  During both nap time and bed time we put the kids in pull-ups since they don't always wake up dry.      

Day Two: 
We started the exact same as day one - nothing changed except we were well rested.  It was worse than the first day!  Neither kid had any success and we went through our entire stash of training underwear in about two hours.  The kids would sit on the toilet and as soon as they left the bathroom would pee all over the place.  By nap time all four of us needed a break!!!  This wasn't how it was supposed to go, I was prepared, we did everything we "should" have but it wasn't working.  I asked for help from my facebook mammas and the encouragement and suggestions poured in.  Matt and I regrouped and set our new game plan.  Most things stayed the same, however, the kids were going to go naked, we only did two skittles for pee, and there were no more observer treats.  We also hung a pair of "big kid underwear" in the bathroom.  They were very excited about them but we told them they could only have them if they had no accidents for a day. These changes seemed to work.  Zoey only had two accidents and Bryce had four.  By the end of the day the timer was out the window - they were going too often for us to reset it.  We ended the day more encouraged and hopeful than we had started it!

Day Three: 
The kids spent all day naked.  We also continued with the timer and treats.  It really seemed to click for Zoey, she was telling us when she had to go usually before the timer went off.  She made it to dinner time with only a few accidents and requested her underwear so we let her try.  Within minutes she had an accident in them so we went back to staying naked.  
Bryce, however, was done.  He didn't want to try anymore, kept having accidents, and just got upset.  After several conversations and regrouping we decided to stop his potty training for now.  We put him back in a diaper and he was so much happier.  
By the end of the long weekend Matt and I were exhausted and he was more than ready to return to work the next morning.  I honestly don't know how I would have done those first three days without him though!    

Day Four: 
Tuesday started out the same as Monday ended except Matt was at work - Bryce wore a diaper and Zoey went naked.  After about three hours of being accident free Zoey requested underwear so we tried them.  I set the time for ten minutes and checked to make sure she was dry every time it went off.  I only had to ask if she needed to go potty a few times, she was usually the one to tell me it was time.  Every time she tried I asked Bryce if he wanted to try to but he told me no every time.  I didn't push or get upset when he told me no, he needed to be in control and I was completely ok with that.  He was much happier encouraging his sister instead.  Zoey did great and made it through the entire day with only two accidents!  

Day Five: 
Zoey wore underwear all day, she only got one skittle for pee and two skittles for poop, and I didn't set a timer.  I was mindful of the time but never made a big deal about it.  If she hadn't gone to the bathroom I checked to make sure she was dry about every fifteen minutes but I tried not to ask if she needed to try until it got to about twenty minutes.  She did great with this.  She ran to the bathroom to go and sometimes didn't even tell me she was going!  We also worked on the steps after going - wiping, flushing, underwear on, and washing hands.  I had her work on putting her own underwear on.  I had never really thought about that part - how do you tell a kid the difference between the front and the back?  Thankfully hers have a bow in the front - the bow goes by her belly button.  She only had three accidents during the entire day!!!  Bryce also asked to have his diaper changed about half of the time but still didn't want to use the potty.  

Day Six: 
We added pants into the mix and Zoey didn't seem fazed by it at all!  I didn't set a timer and rarely asked if she needed to go.  She played as usual all day with stops for the potty.  She even tried to convince Bryce to use the potty!  He did sit on it but only for two seconds.  Zoey made it all day with no accidents! 
  
Day Seven: 
Today didn't seem like it was any different than before potty training.  Zoey used the potty all day mostly without being reminded or asked if she needed to go.  She stopped asking for treats as often and we didn't offer.  We had another successful, no accident day.  I think I can excitedly whisper "she is potty trained" which makes for a happy mamma and happy little girl!    
Bryce did ask to use the potty a handful of times with no success but at least he is trying.  He is more aware of wet diapers and wants them off the second he goes.  I think that is a good sign!  

We still have not tried going out of the house except for short walks in front of the house or playing in the yard but that is next on the list.  I don't expect it always to go smoothly - I know we will have rough days and set-backs, I expect that.  For now I am going to be happy with how far Zoey has come and how well she is doing!  

We will try again with Bryce when he seems to be ready.  Maybe Zoey will do it for us?!?  

This week was full of ups and downs!  I struggled with self doubt and second guessed myself but I also helped my child make a huge transition smoothly and was able to share in the joy and pride that she has in that.  I had to learn to trust my gut.  No matter how much I planned, talked, and researched sometimes there just isn't a right answer.  I was reminded in the middle of a conversation that I do know what is best for my kids and I won't find that answer in a book, or on a blog, or even through a discussion.  Even though it didn't go like I planed or expected, I did do it right.  We did just what we needed to for each of our children.  Overall it was a great week and I am one proud Mamma!!!  Wish us luck on our first outing this weekend!  And I will post a new blog post when my little man decides it is his turn to transition to the potty!     


The Books we used: 
"The New Potty" by Gina and Mercer Mayer
"Pirate Potty" by Samantha Berger
"Princess Potty" by Samantha Berger
"Potty Time" by Caroline Jayne Church (This one is the favorite and most requested.)

Training Underwear: 

Goodnight!!!
.katherine.

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